Things My Husband Says (Out of the Blue, Book 1) by Barbara Blue

Things My Husband Says 

By Barbara Blue 

Short and Sweet Review by Rachel

DO NOT READ THIS BOOK IF THE FOLLOWING SENTENCE OFFENDS YOU,

“I'm full of "baby gravy". You need to do something about that.”

THINGS MY HUSBAND SAYS is an unfiltered collection of conversations between myself and my husband of over twenty-five years. If you have lost your ability to laugh at inappropriate bedroom banter between two married and consenting adults, then IMMEDIATELY STOP READING! This book is not for you. We are from completely different tribes and you will hate everything about this book. I prefer to avoid receiving bad reviews when possible...So help me, help you, help me by you not reading this book full of ridiculous references about fornication.

Emma Chase, NY Times Bestselling Author says,"THINGS MY HUSBAND SAYS is a collection of laugh out loud, holds nothing back, unabashedly honest, gigglingly relatable episodes that are bursting with real-life and real love on every single page. A great read for old married people, newlyweds, singles, and everyone in between."

Joe “Not in My Town” Martin says, “He’s a true inspiration to mankind and they should erect statues of him for us to salute.”

Bryan, The Husband said, “You better not be using my real name in this.”

Out of the Blue Series, Volume One
DISCLAIMER: Paperback copies contain emojis that may appear pixelated or fuzzy due to the printing process. The author chose to keep the emojis in the paperback to maintain the added humor they provide for each episode.  

My Thoughts

Barbara.....Y'all nasty. BAHAHHAA!!!! But seriously....  

This book is exactly what it says it'll be! 

Things My Husband Says is a collection of short stories and conversations that happen between Blue and her husband. It's a funny, and sometimes ewww-inducing look into their "geriatric love nest." If you follow her on social media, you know exactly what you're getting into. If you don't follow her, you're missing out! Unless you're a prude, or if you don't enjoy completely inappropriate sexual innuendos. But....let's be honest, those are the spice of life. 

Here's a peek at one of my favorite "episodes", but you really have to see each one with the emoji's that Blue adds, they totally complete each episode!

Episode #36
Him: I've got a hard on. At our age, we should never let a hard on go to waste. 

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The Edge of Never by J.A. Redmerski

The Edge of Never (The Edge of Never #1) by J.A. Redmerski 

Released November 15, 2012

Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

"Twenty-year-old Camryn Bennett had always been one to think out-of-the-box, who knew she wanted something more in life than following the same repetitive patterns and growing old with the same repetitive life story. And she thought that her life was going in the right direction until everything fell apart.

Determined not to dwell on the negative and push forward, Camryn is set to move in with her best friend and plans to start a new job. But after an unexpected night at the hottest club in downtown North Carolina, she makes the ultimate decision to leave the only life she’s ever known, far behind.

With a purse, a cell phone and a small bag with a few necessities, Camryn, with absolutely no direction or purpose boards a Greyhound bus alone and sets out to find herself. What she finds is a guy named Andrew Parrish, someone not so very different from her and who harbors his own dark secrets. But Camryn swore never to let down her walls again. And she vowed never to fall in love.

But with Andrew, Camryn finds herself doing a lot of things she never thought she’d do. He shows her what it’s really like to live out-of-the-box and to give in to her deepest, darkest desires. On their sporadic road-trip he becomes the center of her exciting and daring new life, pulling love and lust and emotion out of her in ways she never imagined possible. But will Andrew’s dark secret push them inseparably together, or tear them completely apart?"

Due to sexual content and language, this book is recommended for 17+ – Adult Contemporary Women’s – New Adult Fiction

This is the story of Camryn Bennett and Andrew Parrish, two people who have come to a cross roads in their life where they realize they have to find something else, some other way to cope with the struggles they are facing or they will slowly fade away from the world entirely. They both have their own emotional issues that they are facing all alone; so they both decide the path they have to choose needs to be something different and unconventional. As luck would have it, they both find themselves coincidentally on the same bus, traveling to different places, and hoping to find some type of internal peace. 

Seduction & Snacks by Tara Sivec

Seduction & Snacks (Chocolate Lovers #1)

By Tara Sivec

Released: June 2012

Spoiler Free Review by Rachel

Synopsis:

Claire is a twenty-something, single mom that grudgingly helps her best friend sell sex toys while she attempts to make enough money to start her own business to give her foul-mouthed, but extremely loveable (when he's asleep) toddler a better life.

When Carter, the one-night-stand from her past that changed her life forever, shows up in her hometown bar without any recollection of her besides her unique chocolate scent, Claire will make it a point that he remembers her this time.

With Carter's undisguised shock at suddenly finding out he has a four-year-old son and Claire's panic that her stretch marks and slim to none bedroom experience will send the man of her dreams heading for the hills, the pair will do whatever they can to get their happily ever after.

Warning: contains explicit sex, profanity and enough sarcasm to choke a horse.

******

Review

Tara Sivec, you crazy broad.

This book had me rolling in laughter and tears....and that's putting it mildly! There was plenty of sugary sweet, a shit load of sass, and a fluck ton of one liners that'll have you giggling like a prepubescent tweenager.

The synopsis pretty much lays it all out there for you. Claire meets Carter at a party, they have a wee bit too much fun, things happen because of said fun, and then....poof, neither really remembers the other. Not enough to locate them again. And Claire REALLY needs to locate this stud muffin, STAT!Years later, in walks Carter into her workplace and the rest is printed for your reading pleasure.

Actual, real LIFE happens in this book, and I freakin floved it!!! 

Seduction and Snacks was such a  unique experience and different from anything I'd ever read. With chapter titles such as "I Got a Big Weiner", "Claire's Coochie Kills", "Quivering Loins", and "Have You Seen Mike Hunt", how can it not be hilariously great?

 Pacing and story flow is spot on with hilarious secondary characters. Claire's father was one of my favorites! I was late to the Tara Sivec game but I cannot wait to get my hands on the rest of this series! Find her on facebook and twitter, you won't regret it!

Tara Sivec on Facebook

Seduction & Snacks on Amazon

Goodreads for Seduction & Snacks

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With This Heart by RS Grey

With This Heart by RS Grey

Released April 6th 2014

Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

"If someone had told me a year ago that I was about to fall in love, go on an epic road trip, ride a Triceratops, sing on a bar, and lose my virginity, I would have assumed they were on drugs. 

Well, that is, until I met Beckham. 

Beck was mostly to blame for my recklessness. Gorgeous, clever, undeniably charming Beck barreled into my life as if it were his mission to make sure I never took living for granted. He showed me that there were no boundaries, rules were for the spineless, and a kiss was supposed to happen when I least expected. 

Beck was the plot twist that took me by surprise. Two months before I met him, death was knocking at my door. I'd all but given up my last scrap of hope when suddenly, I was given a second chance at life. This time around, I wasn't going to let it slip through my fingers. 

We set out on a road trip with nothing to lose and no guarantees of tomorrow. 

Our road trip was about young, reckless love. 

The kind of love that burns bright. 

The kind of love that no road-map could bring me back from."

Taking chances, falling in love for the first time, and learning to live!

Hate to Love You by Elise Alden

Hate to Love You by Elise Alden

Released June 2, 2014

Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

"Despite my slutty reputation, I was technically a virgin at eighteen. But it turns out all those sex-ed teachers aren’t just trying to scare you. The faint positive on a budget pregnancy test sent me spinning, moments before meeting my sister’s snooty new fiancé.

Shaking hands with upper-crusty James was like downing a triple shot of vodka. Dizzy with desire, confused by my body’s reaction, and shocked by the possessiveness flashing in his eyes, I deceived him that night and told the world at their wedding reception.

The truth?

I slept with my sister’s fiancé. Hot and sweaty, all night long in a room so dark he couldn’t tell I wasn’t her.

The lie? 

Said fiancé is the father of my child. The one I signed over my rights to just before he was born.

That was seven years ago. 

It’s time to come clean."

OK. Let me start by saying....I did NOT think I was going to enjoy this book AT ALL. But boy, I was totally deceived. This book had me on such a ridiculous roller coaster I can't even explain it. At first I hated it and was just going to stop, but then I continued, and things got a little bit interesting, then a bit annoying, then very very hooking, and then I hated it, but then I liked it… and it was like that the entire book.!

Rusty Nailed (Cocktail #2) by Alice Clayton

Rusty Nailed (Cocktail #2) by Alice Clayton
Released June 24, 2014
Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

"In this sequel to Wallbanger, the second book in the Cocktail series, fan favorites Caroline and Simon negotiate the rollercoaster of their new relationship while house-sitting in San Francisco.

Playing house was never so much fun—or so confusing. With her boss on her honeymoon, Caroline’s working crazy long hours to keep the interior design company running—especially since she’s also the lead designer for the renovation of a gorgeous old hotel on Sausalito. So with her hotshot photographer boyfriend gallivanting all over the world for his job, she and Simon are heavy-duty into “absence makes the heart grow fonder” mode. Neither has any complaints about the great reunion sex, though! Then Simon decides he’s tired of so much travelling, and he’s suddenly home more. A lot more. And wanting Caroline home more, too. Though their friends’ romantic lives provide plenty of welcome distraction, eventually Caroline and Simon have to sort their relationship out. Neither wants “out of sight, out of mind,” but can they create their own happy mid-ground cliché?

USA TODAY bestselling author Alice Clayton delivers another delicious, frothy cocktail of a book, shaking up her characters, stirring in laugh-out-loud humor, and serving sizzling romance straight up!"

Love, in Spanish (LIE #2) by Karina Halle

Love, in Spanish (LIE #2) by Karina Halle

Released November 11, 2014
Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

“She sat beside me on the bus – and she changed my whole life.” 

Successful, wealthy and absurdly handsome – Spanish ex-football player Mateo Casalles seemed like he had it all. A high-society wife, an adorable little girl, and flashy apartments in Madrid and Barcelona only sweetened the deal. But there was more to Mateo than met the eye – a life of uncertainty and regret that colored his black and white world. 

That was until Vera Miles came into his life like a shooting star. Tattooed, wild and young, Vera seemed like Mateo’s polar opposite at first. But you can’t choose who you fall in love with and the two lost souls did everything they could to be together, all while suffering the grave consequences. 

Now with Mateo divorced and living in Madrid with Vera, there is a whole new set of challenges and setbacks facing the couple and rocking the foundation of their star-crossed relationship. "

It's here, it's here...the continuation of Love in English, which wasn't originally planned...but here by popular demand! I pre-ordered this one a while back...and I'm so glad it's FINALLY here!!!!!! Don't worry, we will not re-live the first books story, but we will continue their love story... Mateo and Vera in Love in Spanish will face more twist, turns,  and challenges. But the questions now is, how will they handle these situations? Is their love strong enough to surpass the risk of being together?

The Duet by R.S. Grey

The Duet by R.S. Grey

Released November 11, 2014

Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

"When 27-year-old pop sensation Brooklyn Heart steps in front of a microphone, her love songs enchant audiences worldwide. But when it comes to her own love life, the only spell she’s under is a dry one. 

So when her label slots her for a Grammy performance with the sexy and soulful Jason Monroe, she can’t help but entertain certain fantasies... those in which her G-string gets more play than her guitars'.

Only one problem. Jason is a lyrical lone wolf that isn’t happy about sharing the stage—nor his ranch — with the sassy singer. But while it may seem like a song entitled ‘Jason Monroe Is an Arrogant Ho’ basically writes itself, their label and their millions of fans are expecting recording gold…

They’re expecting The Duet."

The Duet was such a fun and comical read.  If you're looking to step away and read something light and witty, The Duet is perfect.  Actually, any book by R.S. Grey is perfect for you. I love all of her books so far! I was gifted a copy by a friend in the RS Greys Girls Group...and I'm so grateful. Isn't the cover beautiful!?

Learning to Spy (Behind the Stars #2) by Leigh Talbert Moore

Learning to Spy (Behind the Stars #2) by Leigh Talbert Moore

Released November 9, 2014
Spoiler Free review by Krystal and Meagan

We received a copy in exchange for an honest review.

"Prentiss Puckett is certain of three things:
-Graduation is two weeks away.
-Summer only gets hotter in south Mississippi.
-She’s getting a job with air-conditioning.

She did not expect to be kidnapped walking to work.
 And she never expected to become a hero."

When we meet back up with Prentiss in part two, not much has changed. She still plans to find a way out, but now her tactics have changed. Knowing she can't just run, Prentiss tries to get help from a few people, but only some are willing. Braxton tries to talk her out of it, but of course when you tell someone they can't do something, they have to try proving you wrong. Even if it means she dies trying.

When Prentiss over hears things that she knows she shouldn't, she decides the easiest way to find information out about where they are and why, is to befriend someone. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer? She willingly did more work around the place, and Gallatin was not who she expected to get close to. 

We gave the first volume of this book 3.5 stars because we felt disconnected from the characters and confused. But as we began to read Learning to Spy, volume 2, things started to become a little more clear. Not only did we learn more about Prentiss and life before captivity, but we start getting bits of information as to what the heck is going on. Personally, we think that the friendship is going to progress into something more. When Prentiss and Gallatin find themselves in an awkward and potentially dangerous position with a pregnant cow giving birth, we see a few aspects of Gallatins willingness to befriend and protect Prentiss

"We can do it,' Gallatin said. "I'll protect you."

Leigh Talbert Moore has continued to keep us on our toes. As the plot beings to unfold, and we edge closer to the next book, we look forward to the answers to the questions in our heads: Who are these people? Where the hell is Jackson? And does Prentiss fall for Gallatin (or vice versa)?

Captive (Behind the Stars #1)  Our Review♥Amazon

Learning to Spy (Behind the Stars #2) Amazon

Harvest Moon (Behind the Stars #3) Our Review♥Amazon

Jackson (Behind the Stars #4) Our Review♥Amazon

Into The Woods (Behind the Stars #5) Our Review♥Amazon

If I Fly (Behind the Stars #6) Our Review♥Amazon 

Wicked By Nature by Madison Sevier

Wicked By Nature by Madison Sevier

Released April 4, 2014
Spoiler Free Review by Krystal
 

I received the book for free through Goodreads First Reads in exchange for an honest review.

"What's a witch supposed to do when she learns that she isn't just a witch? Will Selena use her powers for good? Or will she embrace the part of herself that truly is wicked by nature?  

Until now, life for Selena Barnes has been fairly easy. Aside from the constant stares and gossip of a few busy-bodies in town, her upcoming wedding to a mortal was all she cared about. When she finds out that no one, not even herself, is who they claim to be, she embraces the powers that she'd buried deep inside, unleashing a catalyst of dire consequences.  

When secret after secret is revealed, Selena finds herself racing against time to save her friends, her soul mate, her town and to keep her powers from falling into the wrong hands. Hands that belong to someone she's never met. Someone with whom she shares more than she could have ever imagined. Someone who has been waiting twenty-five years for these events to unfold.

"My name is Selena Barnes and I'm here to tell you that life as a witch isn't all spells and sparkle.
Especially when you’re a high-strung witch who gave up her powers in order to marry a mortal man who just happens to be the most influential and hated guy in all of Salem Ridge.
Try planning a wedding without using magic and you’ll understand why I was already teetering on the edge of my sanity.
Finding out that my fiance is actually a scum-sucking demon who's been trying to get his hands on my magic for a year and realizing that I've been framed for murder was just the tip of the broom!
Long story short: I found out that I’m more than just a spell-casting, potion-making witch. Supposedly, I’m destined to unleash Hell on Earth for my father and his minions.
Oh, and did I mention that in between clearing my name, kicking serious demon ass and catering to my familiar's every whim, I needed to find the time to mate with a sexy werewolf so that I could save the world?  

What could possibly go wrong?"

I am trying to broaden my reading list, and I'm glad I stepped outside of the "smutty love" stories. Wicked by Nature, by Madison Sevier as a paranormal romance, full of witches, demons, and wolves. Yes I said it, but don't leave my review yet..this is not your typical paranormal book. 

We meet Selena Barnes, a young woman that comes from a long line of witches. When her parents were killed in a magical accident, she surrendered her powers and kept them a secret from her fiance’, Shawn Richardson.

In the little town of Salem Ridge, Selena is a outcast for surrendering her powers. Her fiance, Shawn, is in a high financial position in the town, and isn't all he makes out to be. The entire town thinks Selena and foolish, and she can't figure out why so many people do not like Shawn.

Shawn is out of town on business, and Selena is trying to pull together the finishing touches of their soon to be wedding, when Selena receives an email that will change her entire view of everything. Selena finally learns what her family and the entire town sees in Shawn, as well as a few other family secrets. Selena even falls in love with someone from her past, her "soul mate."

When Selena comes face to face with the Elder Council, she has to decide, is she Wicked by Nature?

 I received this book through good reads, and I was hesitant to read it. I've never really thought that I would enjoy a "paranormal" book about wolves, witches, vampires, etc...so the book kinda sat on my shelf for a few weeks. Once I got into the book, it got more interesting. I really liked was Selena's relationship with her familiar, her cat is funny and so protective of Selena. The banter between the two, and the banter between the cat and the underlying characters was hilarious.

Purchase Link:
Amazon: Kindle Edition

Love, in English by Karina Halle

Love, in English by Karina Halle

Released April 20, 2014
Spoiler Free Review by Krystal
 

 

"He’s thirty-eight. I’m twenty-three.

He speaks Spanish. I speak English.

He lives in Spain. I live in Canada.

He dresses in thousand-dollar suits. I’m covered in tattoos.

He’s married and has a five-year old daughter.

I’m single and can’t commit to anyone or anything.

Until now. Because when they say you can’t choose who you fall in love with, boy ain’t that the f*#king truth.

***

To a restless dreamer like Vera Miles, it sounded like the experience of a lifetime. Instead of spending her summer interning for her astronomy major, she would fly to Spain where she’d spend a few weeks teaching conversational English to businessmen and women, all while enjoying free room and board at an isolated resort. But while Vera expected to get a tan, meet new people and stuff herself with wine and paella, she never expected to fall in love. 

 

Mateo Casalles is unlike anyone Vera has ever known, let alone anyone she’s usually attracted to. While Vera is a pierced and tatted free spirit with a love for music and freedom, Mateo is a successful businessman from Madrid, all sharp suits and cocky Latino charm. Yet, as the weeks go on, the two grow increasingly close and their relationship changes from purely platonic to something…more. 

Something that makes Vera feel alive for the first time.

Something that can never, ever be.

Or so she thinks"

Shelter Me (Shelter Me #1) by Kathy Coopmans

Shelter Me (Shelter Me #1) by Kathy Coopmans
Released September 2014
Spoiler Free Review by Krystal

"At the young age of nineteen, Shayne Andrews thought she had it all. She had the love of her life, her high school sweetheart, and a bright future ahead of her. That is, until one day he just disappeared, leaving a note as his only goodbye. With her heart shattered and broken, Shayne did the only thing she could. She left her small town on the shores of Lake Michigan to start her life over, needing to distance herself from the memories she and Luke had made. At that time, she vowed to herself that she would never return to her hometown again. Seven years later, Shayne realizes that fate is not on her side as she returns home for her aunt’s funeral, bringing back the one secret she swore to protect.

Luke Schavone has regretted every day that he had to leave Shayne behind. Though he didn’t have a choice, his heart still bore the scars from the impact. After five years, Luke returned only to find that Shayne was gone. His best friend was the only lifeline he had to finding her, but Adam wasn’t talking. When the one thing Luke has wanted everyday for the past seven years runs right into him one night, he becomes determined to make sure he doesn’t lose her again. 

At first, Shayne is hesitant. She wouldn’t be able to survive losing him again, but the pull toward him is so fierce, she can’t deny herself the chance. With the decision to start over, Luke and Shayne must admit truths and come to terms with the events that forced them apart in the first place. When secrets are revealed and old threats come to pass, will Luke be able to shelter Shayne from the destruction, or will she become lost to him forever?"

Shelter Me is a second chance, contemporary romance and it is the first book in the Shelter Me Series.